Chapter 64

“It’s a poisonous herb that doesn’t need petals anyway.”

“But you still can’t!!”

Pat’s fussing made me give up entirely. I stopped the flower fortune. Ominously, only one flower was left, and the next words I’d have to say were…

“No. Don’t even think about it.”

I threw the petal far away.

Even if Evan likes me now, it’ll change later. The reason he fell for me will blow away like dust once he falls hard for the heroine. I wasn’t planning on joining their family. I was planning to retire comfortably with the business the duke gave me.

“You should head back. You’re hiding here to avoid the young master again, right?”

“Ugh…”

Ever since I declared the annulment, Evan’s letters have flooded in. He even came to the mansion. Avoiding him felt awkward, so I came all the way here. It’s been over a week of hiding like this.

“Yeah, I’ll go.”

I waved weakly. I’d been agonizing for over a week, and no good solution came. Evan’s letters increased by the day—pages filled with earnest words. So I avoided reading them. I just stared out the window and sighed again. My mind was a mess. A fragment of the past flashed up for no reason.

“I’m hopeless. They say when someone wounds you deeply, you remember it until you die. I guess I remember it even after being reborn.”

Everyone insisted Evan liked me. They were certain. But I couldn’t accept that purely. It only tangled my head even more, left me worrying about the best course of action. I shook my head. When the fated day comes, all this will feel pointless.

“The festival is coming up.”

The reason I rushed to make Evan’s antidote was to ensure that the day of his first meeting with Elena in the original story would go smoothly.

Then—while I was blankly staring outside—I noticed a familiar carriage.

“Th-that’s…?”

I wanted to turn the carriage around immediately, but if I’d seen him, he’d already seen me. And he hadn’t even entered the mansion. He was standing outside the front gate. Who knew how long he’d been there? I hurriedly looked up at the sky. The sun was already setting, and the wind had grown cold.

“…Evan.”

I pushed open the window and leaned out. The coachman said it was dangerous, but I didn’t hear him. I only saw Evan’s gaunt face.

He came to see me because I wouldn’t see him. He waited because I wouldn’t come.

‘What if I’d been inside the mansion? What if I never came out…?’

My chest tightened.

Fine. Pat was right. I couldn’t avoid him forever.

I got out of my carriage and walked toward him. Even when the wheels stopped, even when he heard my approaching footsteps, Evan didn’t turn his head. Even when I stood right next to him.

He just stared straight at my mansion’s gate. He wasn’t blocking the road—if I hadn’t seen him, I would’ve walked right past. Judging by his reaction, he seemed determined not to speak unless I initiated the conversation—consideration for someone who’d been avoiding him.

“…Evan.”

I spoke quietly, my mouth dry.

“You’re here?”

Evan finally turned his head. And I saw the paper in his hand.

“Lep. Take it.”

“Huh…? O-okay…”

He handed the paper to me. As if that was the only reason he’d come. His demeanor was strangely calm.

I looked up at him, confused. I had no idea how long he had been standing there. His reddened cheeks and the servants anxiously watching from afar made it obvious enough.

I looked at the paper he gave me—and my eyes flew open. Shock replaced confusion.

It was an annulment document.

‘Why…?’

The one who had refused it so fiercely… was now handing one to me himself.

Last time, he had ripped the papers to shreds. So why this sudden change?

Except… it wasn’t that he changed. Evan was still the same. His trembling, fragile voice revealed everything.

“I hate it… but I know I’ve burdened you a lot. That’s probably why you brought me the annulment as soon as I recovered.”

His eyes held layers of emotions—sadness and helplessness most of all.

My lips parted wordlessly.

It was I who first proposed the annulment. But after hearing him say that, I couldn’t just take the papers. I couldn’t even ask, So we’re ending it now?

But it was something I had predicted from the beginning. It would hurt now. But people break up, meet someone new, fall in love again, find their true partner. I was merely someone passing through his life.

‘Call me a terrible woman and I won’t deny it.’

One day he’d understand.

“I understand, Evan…”

I nodded, ready to answer. But then Evan suddenly grabbed my hand—tight. As if terrified of what I was about to say, as if desperately trying to stop me from leaving.

He was the one who gave me the annulment papers, but fear had overtaken him. His voice cracked like a wounded animal.

“The truth is… I don’t understand. Why you suddenly turned away from me. So just… give me a little time? If you really hate me, I’ll accept it. But… Lep, you don’t hate me… do you…?”

“…”

“I thought I made it obvious how much I liked you. Did you not notice? Or maybe you really just dislike me. I know my feelings must be confusing you.”

He started rambling. A tear hung dangerously at his lashes. It didn’t fall. That made it hurt even more. He bit his lip to keep from crying.

I could see exactly what he’d gone through while we hadn’t met. He was hoping—desperately—that his sincerity reached me, that I would choose him.

My heart felt like it dropped to the floor. The feeling wasn’t any different from when he drank poison in my place.

‘Looking into these eyes… makes me feel like I’m truly loved.’

Someone from my distant past flickered across my mind—a remarkable person who, just like Evan, didn’t fit with me.

I stared at the annulment document. The seal was smudged at the edge. As if he pressed it hard yet hesitated at the last second.

“I know. If you really want to annul it… even if we do… my feelings won’t change. If you want to end it, I’ll follow your decision…”

His hand slowly released mine.

Silence fell. He waited for my decision, head bowed. I stared at the document.

I took a deep breath, then forced the words out through trembling lips.

“What are you talking about? I’m the same as always.”

It wasn’t a lie. I had always been the same. I never planned to maintain our engagement. I intended to match him with Elena.

I brushed the swirling thoughts away.

My goal was to help Elena and Evan. To support his happiness.

‘A small kindness in childhood can be mistaken for love.’

Feelings waver. But if Evan truly had no interest in Elena and instead wanted to stay with me…

I forced a smile.

I couldn’t forget my premise: everything I’d done was to secure his future happiness.

“I could never hate you, Evan! I’ll always stay by your side. That won’t change.”

He was someone I always wanted to watch over. But I never once imagined taking the place beside him. That spot was never mine. On Evan’s face, I thought I could see someone else’s reflection.

So I chose to speak honestly. He’d been honest—my turn.

“Sorry. It’s not your fault. I just… don’t know my own heart. To me, it always felt like I was some kind of… symbol of misfortune for you…”

“That’s not true! I… I was happy because you were by my side. Don’t be afraid. I won’t change.”

I couldn’t meet those truthful eyes. I dropped my gaze and smiled faintly.

“Evan. When you took the poison for me and they said you didn’t have long… it shook me. It felt like it was my fault.”

“Lep, that was an accident.”

No. It was fate. And Evan had a fate of his own.

“If it hadn’t been for that poisoning, you would’ve become someone far above my reach. You’re the young master of a noble house.”

“…”

“Evan. You know the Founding Festival is in a week, right?”

He looked confused at my sudden topic change, but I ignored it.

“Let’s go together that day. With Elena and Piote.”

“The… festival?”

“Yeah.”

He opened and closed his mouth several times, then nodded.

He knew. I hadn’t rejected the annulment. And he knew that in my hands was a document stamped with the ducal seal—one signature away from ending everything.