Chapter 21

“What is an ‘affection deficit’?”

Van looked puzzled, as if he had never heard the term “affection deficit” before.

The people’s knowledge here seemed to be stuck in the Middle Ages. This meant that a term like “affection deficit” didn’t exist in this world, unlike my previous one.

‘That’s why even when Adel acted like that, no one fundamentally understood him or helped him.’

“This might take a while. Please, have a seat.”

“I’m fine listening from here.”

“Think of it as having tea with me. It’ll be more comfortable for me to talk that way.”

Reluctantly, Van sat down across from me and expertly poured the tea.

As I organized my thoughts while watching him, he took a slow sip of his tea, as if to wait for me.

He was a busy man and probably didn’t have a lot of time for this, but this small action showed me how much he cared for Adel.

“Affection deficit is…”

I began to explain, recalling the hazy memories from my past life.

An affection deficit was a psychological state that arose when a child didn’t receive enough affection and attention in their early years.

I knew there were various behavioral patterns if you delved deeper into the subject, but since I wasn’t an expert, I couldn’t remember the details.

I did my best to explain Adel’s behavior as I had observed it.

I had also experienced something similar in my past life. The more I talked, the more the memories of my former self, Lee Hyun, who had struggled with a depression and an affection deficit that I hadn’t completely forgotten, began to creep back.

‘But now, I’m Chacha Blueberry.’

I swallowed the tea with a dry throat and recalled the love I had received from the Blueberry County family.

Here, I was loved unconditionally and I was happy.

These negative emotions couldn’t shake me anymore.

“…So, if it’s truly an affection deficit, then Adel’s excessive pranks might be a way of demanding love and attention.”

Van nodded as if he understood my explanation, and he drank his tea with a slightly somber expression.

Putting down his teacup, he lowered his head slightly and spoke.

“How did you come to that conclusion?”

Unlike what I expected, which was for him to tell me about the family’s past, Van didn’t give me the answer I wanted right away.

As a seasoned butler, he kept his head bowed just enough to be polite and not offend me, but he was answering a question with a question, which was a rude thing to do.

I realized that he was doing it on purpose.

‘Is he testing me now? Or is there not enough trust for him to tell me the family’s secrets?’

I thought about it for a moment, but I decided not to point out his rudeness and instead answer honestly.

“Generally, children who are truly mischievous enjoy the reaction they get when they play a prank. If the other person gets upset or scolds them, they might not stop, but they usually don’t prank that person again.”

If Adel had only increased the intensity because he enjoyed the reactions, I would have just considered him a prankster.

But Adel played pranks regardless of whether the other person was upset or not.

So, what if the purpose wasn’t to enjoy the reaction but to get the “attention” that came with it?

‘As if he was saying, ‘Look at me more, and for longer.’’

The more mischievous the child was, the more the servants who were on the receiving end had to pay attention to Adel. Just like how Van asked for my understanding and was about to chase after Adel on our first meeting.

“I think Adel is blindly clinging to the gazes and attention that he gets when he plays a prank.”

After calmly finishing my thought, I looked up from my teacup, and I could see Van’s expression as he met my eyes.

He was smiling as if he was satisfied with my answer.

Seeing his expression, I spoke with a little more confidence.

“So, can you help me?”

Van immediately got up from his seat and bowed deeply.

“I apologize, Lady Chacha.”

This wasn’t a refusal to help, but an apology for testing me.

I wasn’t offended. The Van I had observed was a person with extreme loyalty to the ducal family, and yet he had always been kind to me, a sudden newcomer.

I could fully understand why he tested me.

“I couldn’t just speak about the ducal family’s private matters without you asking first. Please forgive my rudeness.”

“It’s alright. Van, you were just doing your duty.”

At my words, Van sat back down and composed himself.

I waited for him and then carefully asked, “Will you tell me now?”

Hearing my question, Van’s expression hardened slightly. It seemed to be a difficult memory for him to recall as well.

Van began to speak in a calm voice.

“For eight years, until the former Duke Milo passed away, the ducal family was a happy family.”

But Milo Eclipse lost his life during a monster subjugation.

I nodded slightly, recalling the fact that I already knew.

“When the former Duke passed away, Lady Roana was only sixteen years old and lost her right arm in that subjugation. And the current Duke had to bear the burden of the ducal family at the young age of twelve.”

“Then Adel was…”

“He was two years old.”

The story about Kate wasn’t mentioned, but I could easily guess.

The death of her beloved husband.

That must be the reason why she wailed and wandered the castle every night.

‘So, Adel, during a time when he should have been forming bonds with his parents and family…’

He was left among family members who had lost their father and had no room to take care of a child.

Van continued his story.

“The servants who were with Lord Adel instead of his family also had problems. They weren’t bad people, but they were people with extreme loyalty to the ducal family… Even the nannies treated Lord Adel only as the second son of the ducal family, a noble, and a master they had to serve.”

“That’s not the kind of way a child would feel warmth.”

“Yes. There must have been a distance for Lord Adel.”

The servants might have acted that way out of consideration for the ducal family, but it would have been hard for a young Adel to understand that.

He would have felt a sense of distance from their attitude and would have felt even lonelier.

“Then one day, Lord Adel broke a teacup as a prank, and since it was something he could have been seriously hurt by, the nanny worried about him very much.”

Feeling something from his next words, I immediately asked Van, “Did the nanny scold him?”

“…”

“She didn’t, did she?”

“Yes. Now that you mention it, I think this incident might have been the turning point for Lord Adel’s way of thinking.”

It would have been better if she had scolded him and pointed out his mistake.

But it seemed that the nanny didn’t have that kind of emotional connection with him. And she must have just endured it until she was fed up with the child’s pranks and quit.

‘Because there was no affection.’

That’s probably why the nannies and the servants who attended him kept changing. In my opinion, the constant change also had a bad emotional impact on him.

Adel must have also known that people were leaving him because of his pranks.

‘But he probably couldn’t stop.’

He couldn’t give up the attention, whether it was shock or anything else, that he got when he played a prank.

And even in the midst of all that, Adel never pranked Nine, Roana, or Kate.

As if his family wouldn’t even pay attention to him no matter what he did.

“…”

“Lady Chacha. I beg you, please take care of Lord Adel.”

Van, who had finished his story, bowed his head to me again with a desolate expression.

I could feel how much he had agonized over this request from his bowed head.

It must have been a difficult decision for him to tell me about the past that the ducal family hadn’t told me and to place his expectations on me.

His request was heavy, but I nodded slightly.

I didn’t want to turn away from a wounded child, either.

“I’ll try.”

***

I sent Van away and walked around the castle aimlessly. It was a habit I had to organize my thoughts.

Even after achieving my goal of calling Van and hearing the family’s story, my mind was not clearing up.

‘Rather, it had become more disturbed.’

Van said the Eclipse family was a happy family in the past, but not a single person I had seen looked happy.

Unlike their harmonious past, no one now faced or talked to other family members.

They didn’t come out to greet the family head who returned after a long time, they didn’t eat together, and they didn’t even show any interest in me, who appeared as Nine’s wife out of nowhere…

It was especially saddening that Adel, a child, acted as if his family’s indifference was a given.

Click, clack.

Before I knew it, my feet had led me to the central hall at the castle entrance.

As if possessed, I looked up at the portraits of the Eclipse ducal family hanging there.

They looked harmonious.

The kind-faced former Duke Milo, Kate holding baby Adel in her arms, and the strong and dignified Roana.

And Nine, who looked gentler and was smiling, unlike how he was now.

I carefully took in the portraits filled with happiness.

The first time I came here and passed this painting, I didn’t think anything of it, but after hearing the history from Van, I felt a sense of sadness.

‘In the original novel, it was just one sentence: ‘Nine inherited the ducal title at a young age in place of his father who died in an accident.’’

That short sentence was filled with the pain of this family.

‘What happened to Adel in the original story?’

What about Kate and Roana?

And Nine?

If there had been a major change in the family relationships, it might have had an effect on Nine in the original story as well.

‘If so, it would have been mentioned in the original novel.’

If things really hadn’t changed, wouldn’t this pain have remained in a corner of Nine’s heart?

I shouldn’t have been presumptuous about another person’s inner feelings, but I couldn’t help but think about it.

The happiness depicted here hinted at their love for each other.

I didn’t think such a great emotion could easily disappear in an instant after a family’s harmony and happiness had been built upon love.

They must just be engulfed in sadness. They must all be turning a blind eye to each other’s wounds because they don’t have the room to comfort one another.

I felt a sense of pity and looked at the warm portraits for a long time.